Happy New Year

Written to David Bowie’s “I Know It’s Gonna Happen Someday


A Lunar New Year’s greeting from your local hero nihilist:

Another year of heartwarmth and heartbreak await.

They await equally contradictorily.

They arrive with their tongues in each other’s mouths.

But I don’t know why it feels different this year.

No

No I do, to a degree

I go in ready to receive

Ready for the bias-confirming valleys and the scrutinized peaks.

The self-sabotage and the hypocritical altruism.

The happiness I martyr on behalf of others who did not ask for my self-servingness and the helplessness I selfishly absorb also for them.

And this catharsis I feel on the song’s 13th loop

It’s gonna slip away.

Just like it does every time

And just like every time I won’t know when I’ll get another come-and-go chance at this

This unconditional will to do my part in making the world a kinder more-together place.

But I go in generous.

I go in beyond myself.

I go in giving.

And so whatever loss comes my way I will welcome with open[-doom-crescendo] arms—riding the delirious optimism and resilience I see in those I unconditionally love, look up to, and place my faith in for a kinder more-together world.

Happy New Year.

MAILING LIST SIGNUP

Digital golem obliging…
Digital Golem: It worked though we wish we wer

Published by crescendoangstcinevision

Licensed creative vandalism

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